By Michaela Gordoni
Some parents buy their kids smartphones even though they know it’s too soon — and the reason might surprise you.
A study from Spain found that the main reason parents gave a phone to their kids was because they were concerned about peer pressure. Parents of daughters were more likely to think this way than parents of sons, Parents reported.
Some parents don’t want to argue with their children over getting a smartphone, so they give in.
“The peer pressure is very real,” said Melanie Hempe, founder of ScreenStrong.
“The more you get educated about the science of the addiction process and how young brains are so vastly changed by screens, the less you care,” she added. “You need to get to the point where you do not care what other people think. You have to be perfectly fine with doing what you know in your gut is the right thing for your kids.”
There are numerous studies proving that smartphone and screen use is harmful to young minds. Negative effects include depression, low self-esteem, anxiety, cyberbullying, sleep disturbances, addiction, exposure to negative content and more.
“These touchscreen devices are the fastest dopamine delivery mechanisms ever invented for a child,” said The Anxious Generation author Dr. Jonathan Haidt. “So, all of us recognize that this thing that seems so appealing and attractive, this thing that we use, and we think we know, is literally a drug for our kids.”
And of course, there’s the threat of online predators, who are known to target kids and teens through social media and games.
The University of New Hampshire’s Crimes Against Children Research Center found almost 16% of young adults say they experienced sexual abuse online before they reached adulthood.
Dr. Haidt points out that once you give a child or teen a smartphone, it’s hard to reverse course because they’ll find the real world less interesting.
“And they’re going to scream all the louder for it,” said Dr. Haidt. But, it’s still worth doing.
Parents recommends these tips for parents who want their kids to avoid smartphones: put your foot down/don’t give in to pressure, find a like-minded community to make it easier for you and your child, focus on play and use alternatives, like flip phones.
HGTV stars Ben and Erin Napier have modeled these guidelines and created a community of like-minded parents called Osprey. Its mission is to give kids social-media-free childhoods.
In 2020, Erin shared a photo of a sunlit street and said, “The more I learn about social media, the more it frightens me so I’m going to make an effort to spend less time here. People weren’t built to know the opinions of thousands or even hundreds of their ‘friends.’ The real world is a much nicer place, honestly. 🤩”
Haidt shared on Monday, “My main thesis in #theanxiousgeneration is: We overprotect kids in the real world and underprotect them online. Most American parents have powerful fears about their child’s safety that have far more to do with media hype from the 80s than they do with reality. This generation longs for what most of their parents had — time with friends, in person, without adults. Let’s give it to them.”
It’s important that parents understand the whole picture and make decisions in their child’s best interest. They need to keep in mind childhood isn’t meant to happen through screens.
Read Next: Psychologist Urges Parents to ‘Act Together’ to Keep Kids Off Smartphones
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