By India McCarty
Jinger Duggar Vuolo shared why she prefers “disentangling” as opposed to “deconstructing” faith, as well as how she overcame “performance-based thinking” in her relationship with God.
“My journey has been one of realizing, ‘Okay, there was this teacher who…claimed to speak for God, but he didn’t,” Vuolo said during an appearance on Sadie Robertson Huff’s “Whoa That’s Good” podcast. “But when I started to realize, ‘Okay, these teachings are not, in fact, based in the Bible. They are a man’s opinion and they’re not true.’”
She said she began to “disentangle it,” a phrase she prefers to what some might call “deconstructing” their faith after disappointments or hurt.
“[They] throw out everything,” Vuolo said. “[But] no, God’s word is true. There will be false teachers…we need to be able to go back to the word of God and say, ‘What does it actually say?’”
Related: How This Reality Star Broke Free From People-Pleasing and Found Her Identity in Christ
She added, “It’s slow, it’s painful, it’s hard, but it’s worth it….just opening the Bible and reading the word of God has been the most freeing thing.
Huff then asked Vuolo about a question she gets a lot when she opens up her Instagram to fan questions: “Is God mad at me?”
Vuolo shared that this was a question she often struggled with as well, calling it “performance-based thinking” that can sometimes carry over into her relationships with friends and family. She explained that she often felt worried God was angry with her because she wasn’t praying enough or reading her Bible regularly.
“I think that’s where, as believers, we have to say, ‘Okay, those things are good to want: to pray, to want to read our Bible…but where are we putting our faith?’” she said. “It really starts in my thoughts. It’s in taking these thoughts captive whenever the enemy comes and tells me lies.”
Vuolo previously spoke about this process of “disentanglement,” telling Fox News, “One of the biggest struggles for me was to disentangle truth from error. It’s no longer a burden or duty to try to keep up all these rules…I want to live a life honoring God, but it’s not fear-based.”
“Now I see God as a loving, heavenly Father instead of a domineering taskmaster,” she continued. “I can enjoy life to its fullest and the gifts God has given us. That…would have been squelched because you would be living in superstition and fear…Now I have more clarity. Now I can see God as I ought to see him.”
It’s a topic she discusses in greater detail in her most recent book, 2024’s People Pleaser: Breaking Free From the Burden of Imaginary Expectations.
“I think that from the start, I realized that man, there are so many people who are on this journey of self-discovery with me. And I started to realize more and more I was such a people-pleaser,” she told PEOPLE. “”I really hope that the reader finds help because I have. Even though I don’t have it all together or I don’t have this perfect life, no one does. No one has a perfect life. That’s what I’ve realized, and I want the reader to realize that too.”
Vuolo has been open about her journey through conquering performance-based thinking and is committed to helping others create a healthier relationship with their faith by conquering these kinds of thoughts.
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