Nightbirde’s Family Releases New Essay Describing Jane’s Cancer Battle

Photo from Nightbirde’s Instagram

Nightbirde’s Family Releases New Essay Describing Jane’s Cancer Battle

By Movieguide® Contributor  

In a recent Instagram post, Nightbirde’s team and family shared an essay that Jane “Nightbirde” Marczewski wrote. Nightbirde’s cancer battle made international headlines when she appeared on AMERICA’S GOT TALENT and sang her original song, “It’s OK.” 

The team captioned the post, “On Monday we released an unreleased essay from Jane that she wrote on her journey with cancer titled ‘What Cancer Feels Like.'”  

They added, “Jane’s writing was so honest, raw and real and her relationship with God was just the same. This essay gives you sadness, anger, inspiration, encouragement and hope, roughly in that order. Jane wanted you all to read the notes, songs, poems and essays she wrote as she walked through the darkness. She knew in her heart one day these words would break free from the notebook that kept them in.”  

“Jane told some friends in her life that what she was hearing from God was ‘people will listen to you’ but not out of vanity, out of the conviction that the journey she had walked would sit with more weight with people than if she had not walked the journey at all. She was right, people have listened and are still listening,” they concluded.  

In her essay, Nightbirde revealed what life was like with cancer. She went through her ups and downs but most importantly she finally understood unconditional love.  

She wrote, “The theme of my story is this: unconditional love. The truth is that for years now, that has been at the top of my list for life goals: to understand and believe in unconditional love. I didn’t realize until recently that truly, at the very bottom of me, I believed that I was unlovable. I thought that if I let anyone truly know me, they wouldn’t love me anymore. So I did everything I could to prove to myself and to the world that I was worthy. I climbed social ladders, I practiced my craft, I obsessed overlooking beautiful at every angle. I became the best at everything I could.” 

She described her understanding of unconditional love as her friends and family poured in from everywhere to help her through her diagnosis.  

“My friends scheduled themselves to clean my house every week, a meal train was organized, and three days a week for four months, the doorbell rang with hot food. I never went alone to an appointment–my husband and friends would drop everything and show up for me. Thousands of dollars came in online and through the mail. Packages came in the mail, every day for weeks. My dining room table filled up with flowers, candles, blankets, ChapSticks, letters, books. I was not forgotten,” she wrote.  

“My family drove seven hours to Nashville for Thanksgiving, and took off their hats to show that they all had shaved their heads. My mom couldn’t stay away–a broken relationship mended with soups and old movies and shared cups of tea. My brother called me “Janie” again. We forgave each other for old wounds,” Nightbirde continued. 

She explained, “My husband, whose head was spinning, did everything he could. He picked me up out of bed to slow dance with me. He turned on Tyler Perry movies when I was crying–knowing exactly what would make me laugh. He wrote songs for me, and read to me when I couldn’t sleep. He didn’t have a lot of words, but he always would reach for my purse as if to show me that he would carry anything for me that he knew how to.” 

“I got to see with my own eyes the white stag of unconditional love. The thing that we all stubbornly want to believe in, but most people don’t get to see. When I had lost everything, when it was impossible to pretend to be anything else, I was met with the most extravagant movement of love that I have ever seen,” she concluded. “Cancer came to steal and to kill, but turns out that it actually has given me an irreplaceable gift: an immovable belief in unconditional love, and an understanding of what an honor it is to be here–alive and a part of the moving, golden world.” 


Watch WHEN CALLS THE HEART: Trials of the Heart
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