Don’t Be Confused by the World’s Definition of Love
By Aubrianna Giselle
With Valentine’s Day right around the corner, many couples across the country will head to the movie theater for a nice date or stay at home to watch a fun romantic comedy. It’s a sweet time to appreciate the love you have for your beloved. Here are three simple reminders that will help keep your love biblically rooted, and protect you from the misconceptions of love commonly shown in the media.
1. Love is rarely instant.
In a world of instant communication, instant entertainment and even instant meals, it is no surprise that our definition of love and relationships have become more instant. There is less hard work and time put into these relationships, and they tend to end as quickly as they begin. Real love grows deeper with time, and strengthens through hardship. Instead of always expecting to get what and who we want at the very moment we want it, we should be building relationships that last a lifetime.
Although typically brushed off as just a children’s movie, FROZEN has many strong and biblical messages about love that should be remembered by everyone. 1 Corinthians 13:4 simply says that “love is patient,” and in FROZEN, Anna learns and demonstrates this well. Even though she is quick to “fall in love” with prince Hans after just meeting him, she quickly learns that true love is not instant and actually takes time and work. She eventually grows to love her traveling companion, Kristoff, but fights the hardest for the love that she has for her sister, Elsa, eventually leading Anna to sacrifice herself to save the life of her sister. That is true unconditional love!
2. Love isn’t just a feeling
These days, everyone “loves” everything. The word ‘love’ itself is used to describe any degree of connection or emotional attachment that we have towards anything; regardless if it’s towards a person, a hobby, or a piece of cake. Regrettably, the second that feeling is gone, we are fast to transition to the next thing. Unfortunately, this is even bleeding into our relationships. “Falling in love” as glorified best in the movies is solely about emotions and feelings that come almost as quickly as they leave. Love is so much more than that. It is a daily choice that takes commitment, even when the fuzzy feelings and butterflies aren’t there anymore.
The movie FIREPROOF is a fantastic example of this daily choice of love. After divorce papers are on the table, Caleb decides to fight for his failing marriage like he does every day for other people as a firefighter. He is presented with a 40-day challenge called, “The Love Dare” and begins to do little acts of kindness and love for his wife, with nothing in return. That daily choice to love her, even when he didn’t feel like it or have those “in love” feelings, ended up making all the difference in their marriage.
3. Love isn’t all about you
A typical secular magazine article would describe love as something that is always centered around you. Asking questions like, “What is your husband doing to make you happy?” or, “If your girlfriend isn’t doing this, does she really love you?” It’s always about what the other person should be giving, and if they aren’t solely focused on you, then you should just drop everything and leave. This couldn’t be farther than the truth. Love is a very selfless and giving act between two people that takes sacrifice. It’s about two people trying to out-give and out-serve the other while showing them the love of Christ.
Philippians 2:4 says, “Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others.” The recent movie BROOKLYN captured this selfless love quite well. After leaving her home in Ireland and coming to America, Eilis grows to love an Italian fellow, and they secretly marry right before she heads home to visit her family in Ireland. While back in Ireland, another man finds interest in her and seems like he can give her the happy life that she always wanted back in Ireland. However, after hearing a convicting sermon on marriage, she makes the biggest sacrifice of her life and she decided to leave her family, friends and the possibility of a new perfect life in Ireland to go live her life with her husband in America. Sometimes the sacrifice we have to make is small, and other times it’s life changing, no matter what though, love requires selflessness and sacrifice.
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