Comedian Rickey Smiley Talks Grieving Process After Son’s Tragic Death
By Movieguide® Contributor
Comedian Rickey Smiley is opening up about losing his son Brandon to an accidental overdose last year.
Brandon followed in his father’s footsteps as he was working to become a comedian. But in January of 2023, at the age of 32, he suffered from a fentanyl overdose and ethanol toxicity, which resulted in his death.
Smiley told PEOPLE what it’s like as he approached the one-year anniversary of his son’s death.
“When you come up on the one year, it is almost like it’s happening all over again because you’re triggered,” Smiley said. “I was walking through my home like something was going to happen to my son all over again. It was just horrible. My anxiety was completely through the roof.”
“It was almost like a countdown to the 29th, the day he died,” he added.
The comedian’s father died from an overdose, but Smiley explained that nothing compares to the death of a child.
“It’s your 32-year-old son that died, but man, you start thinking about your 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12-year-old son. You’re thinking about the birthday parties at Chuck E. Cheese, you’re thinking about the kid that slept in the bed with you, that you helped get dressed and brush his teeth,” he described. “That’s your child. I felt it from top to bottom, inside to outside.”
“I feel like I had died. It literally felt like a part of me died,” Smiley continued. “It was depressing, anxiety, sadness. Nothing I ever felt before, and sometimes it makes you feel like you wished you were dead also because the pain is unbearable.”
“Now I see what my granddaddy went through and why he felt the way he felt,” Smiley said last year soon after Brandon’s death. “My granddaddy went through this…with my dad and somehow, here I am going through the same thing my grandparents went through. So just pray for our family.”
He has coped with his grief by writing his new book, “Sideshow: Living with Loss and Moving Forward with Faith.”
“Comedian Rickey Smiley has dealt with these immensely difficult questions for years—first with his father, then with his son. Both battled drug addictions. Both died from overdoses. Both left Rickey weary and wounded. Far from healed, Rickey has learned how to find moments of peace. He’s practicing how to hold the good with the grief, the past gifts with the present heartache, the hope with the hurt. It’s the ‘sideshow’ he’s living. It’s anything but a smooth path, but he’s on it, and he’s moving forward. And he invites you to come with him,” a synopsis reads.
“I just remember days that I would write and the next day, I would just release and cry,” Smiley revealed. “I’ve learned through therapy to sit in my feelings and not try to say, ‘Okay, I’m going to go to work.’ Because one thing I know about grief…grief is like, ‘I’m going to wait for you until you get back. When you get done working, I’m going to be right here waiting on you.’ You can’t control it. When it comes, it comes.”
“It’ll be a great inspiration piece for those that have also suffered a loss.” he said about his book. “So I just hope that the book gives somebody some comfort and some encouraging words.”
Movieguide® reported:
Comedian Rickey Smiley is asking for prayer for himself and his family following the death of his son Brandon.
“Pray for me, pray for our family,” Smiley asked, “[Pray for] my son, my daughter, everyone that was raised with Brandon.”
Smiley shared the news of his son’s death Sunday as he prepared to leave for the airport. He did not specify his son’s age or cause of death; he simply focused on asking for support through prayers.
Since his heartbreaking announcement, Smiley’s posts have been flooded with prayers and condolences from friends and fans.
Smiley took to Instagram Monday morning thanking his fans for their overwhelming support.
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Now more than ever we’re bombarded by darkness in media, movies, and TV. Movieguide® has fought back for almost 40 years, working within Hollywood to propel uplifting and positive content. We’re proud to say we’ve collaborated with some of the top industry players to influence and redeem entertainment for Jesus. Still, the most influential person in Hollywood is you. The viewer.
What you listen to, watch, and read has power. Movieguide® wants to give you the resources to empower the good and the beautiful. But we can’t do it alone. We need your support.
You can make a difference with as little as $7. It takes only a moment. If you can, consider supporting our ministry with a monthly gift. Thank you.
Movieguide® is a 501c3 and all donations are tax deductible.
