By India McCarty
Former HGTV stars Chip and Joanna Gaines recently admitted their parenting style has changed a bit since becoming famous, but at the end of the day, being together is still the most important thing.
“Ten years ago, we were extremely selfish in our desire to protect our family at all costs, which is not easy,” Chip told PEOPLE. “Family was most important. Business was most important. Our family was sincerely the most important, but it was a very close second that we cared so deeply about this business, and we wanted it to be relevant. We wanted it to be real. Now fast-forward 10 years, and things have shifted in this beautiful way.”
The couple are parents to Drake, 20, Ella, 18, Duke, 17, Emmie, 15, and Crew, 7.
Chip explained that, now that the couple are not so focused on “making it” in business, they can truly relax and feel confident in who they are as a couple and as parents.
“I think we have a little more capacity now to think more ‘future,’” Joanna added. “What we care about the most is being together and celebrating moments together.”
She continued, “We can finally have this space to think beyond just the everyday grind. I feel like we’re in this really beautiful season of reflection, but also now we can breathe, and we can see the future. What’s the vision for our family? What’s the vision for this business? Finally, we’re there, and now it’s like, ‘Okay, sky’s the limit!’”
While the couple now have a little more breathing room to balance work and family, Joanna explained in a recent essay for Magnolia Journal that she’s learned to let go of strict expectations on how her life should look.
Related: Chip And Joanna Gaines: ‘Family Is The Most Important Thing in The World’
“I no longer buy the idea that rigidity leads to peace or deep fulfillment,” she wrote. “In my experience, balance can often look like staying still because you’re too afraid to take on more. Too afraid to drop something. Too afraid to tip over. And that’s just not the way I want my world to go on spinning.”
Instead, Joanna explained, “it’s the things that keep me steady that will move me forward,” including time spent with family and friends, as well as in nature.
“It’s being true to how I’m built, meaning I won’t give myself a hard time for working a long day as long as I also make time for a moment of sheer delight,” she concluded.
Chip also penned a piece for Magnolia Journal, reflecting on the ups and downs of his life, and how he wants his kids to experience those same highs and lows.
“Despite what’s commonly thought of as the good life — one where you’re resting on the beach with a piña colada and a fat 401(k) — we are happiest when we’re rocking and rolling and figuring out complicated things,” he wrote.
Chip continued, “I already know these types of images will be fed to my kids every day of their lives. I don’t want them to have an unrealistic or discouraging grasp of the alternative: the joy of the journey.”
While their reality TV fame might have made some things a little easier for the couple, spending meaningful time with family is still the most important thing for the Gaineses.
Read Next: How Chip and Joanna Gaines Are Celebrating 22 Years of Marriage
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