
By Michaela Gordoni
A new study suggests that parents’ social media use negatively affects kids — even when they put the phone away.
Moms who spent a lot of time on social media talked less to their children when they played with them compared to moms who spent less time on social media. The effect carried over even when they weren’t using their phones, CNN reported.
The moms who used social media frequently (averaging 169 minutes per day compared to those who averaged 21 minutes) spoke 29% less to their kids when they played with them.
The study was not performed on fathers, but it’s not much of a stretch to guess that the results for dads would be the same or worse.
“Often our minds wander to activities that are more pleasurable naturally, and we know social media is that experience for most people,” said Kris Perry, executive director of Children and Screens: Institute of Digital Media and Child Development.
Social media is created to be addictive.
Kara Alaimo, associate professor of communication at Fairleigh Dickinson University and author of Over the Influence: Why Social Media Is Toxic for Women and Girls — And How We Can Take It Back, says parents should constantly talk to their kids.
Related: Parents Spend More Time on Phones Than With Kids
“Kids are acutely aware of where a parent is looking,” said the study lead, Liz Robinson, “and they learn what’s important. So, when our gaze is constantly going towards a device, towards a smartphone, well, we’re communicating to our children what’s important in that moment, too. Our attention is one of the best things that we can give to our children.”
Robinson suggests parents give their kids at least 15 minutes of undivided attention each day.
Parents should remind themselves, “there is nowhere but here, and there is no time but now in your child’s mind,” Robinson said. “And so, you have many other thoughts and many other priorities that are floating around in your head. But we can compartmentalize those and be fully present with our child, who knows only this moment, and only our attention.”
It’s established that parents also talk to their kids less, respond more slowly or overreact to interruptions while they are on their phones.
A study published in January shows that children respond more negatively and have more outbursts when their parents spend a lot of time on their phones. Thus, their well-being was poorer.
Parents have a responsibility to be aware of their social media and phone use habits and how they affect their children.
Perry advised, “Understand what the impact of using social media is on you personally, and make sure that you’re mitigating what those impacts are when you go to interact with your child.”
Read Next: ‘Mom, Do You Notice Me?’ Why Parents Need to Put Their Phones Away for Their Kids
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