Sadie Robertson Huff on Postpartum Anxiety: I’m Constantly Fighting Fear
By Movieguide® Staff
Sadie Robertson Huff is candid about the joys and difficulties of motherhood to her first-born daughter, Honey.
The former DUCK DYNASTY star and her husband Christian Huff welcomed Honey James on May 11. Robertson Huff confessed that while it was a joyful time of celebration, she struggled to maintain her mental health.
“I’m constantly trying to fight fear in my life,” Robertson Huff told listeners of her “Whoa! That’s Good” podcast. “It was like, so many emotions happening that I couldn’t really fight the fear like I normally do. All of a sudden, I was just in a state of anxiety. I didn’t even realize that it was creeping us as much as it was.”
“That is such a toxic brain spiral to go through that it will manifest itself in some way,” she added. “I didn’t even realize that those thoughts throughout the day were making me jittery, were making me have all these feelings of anxiety and were making my chest feel super tight, like, I couldn’t breathe.”
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Robertson Huff recalled a particular moment where her husband found her crying in her closet alone.
“I just said, ‘I’m so scared. I’m so scared that something is going to happen to her,'” Robertson explained. “It was so real. I was like, ‘I’m so scared that something is going to happen to her. I’m so scared that she’s not really OK. What if whenever she got stuck [during delivery], the oxygen actually cut off to her head. I’m scared that something happens to me and I am not going to get to be the mom that I want to be to her.”
Despite the couple’s happiness and thankfulness to God for blessing them with a child, Robertson Huff said she was still fearful.
“I didn’t understand how I could be so happy and so joyful, yet also experience so much fear,” Robertson said. “I realized that you don’t have to choose just one of those feelings. You don’t have to choose fear and trade out all the joy. You don’t have to choose joy and trade out all the fear. It can actually go hand in hand.
“The reason I was so fearful is because I loved her so much,” she added. “However, just because it makes rational sense that I had some fear it doesn’t mean that is something I needed to live with.”
Recently, Robertson Huff revealed that the birth of Honey was not a smooth experience and that her baby got stuck.
“I thought they cut me open because of how painful it was when they pressed on my stomach,” Robertson Huff said. “Now I know they were pressing my pelvis bone to get her out because what happened was Honey got stuck. Her shoulder got stuck.
“In that moment, every second counts and they couldn’t get her out for two minutes and ten seconds,” Robertson Huff continued. “This really was very scary and really dangerous. I knew something was wrong because of the pain, and the doctor [had] just told me, ‘Next push, she’s here.'”
After Honey’s birth, Robertson Huff often referred to Honey as a miracle. After a scary and dangerous time in labor, Robertson Huff said that doctors were amazed at the health of Honey.
“They had three doctors check her shoulder because they were in disbelief,” Robertson Huff said. “She never had to have any other care because she was so strong.”
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