Jessa Duggar Seewald Shares Her Past Struggles With Doubts, “Spiritual Depression”
By Allyson Vannatta, Senior Writer
Jessa Duggar Seewald opened up about her struggles with faith in a new video on her YouTube channel.
“If anybody was ever the problem child in the family, I probably could claim that title. I always joke that I probably gave my parents more gray hairs than any of the rest of them combined,” the COUNTING ON star said with a smile on her face.
Seewald explained how her childhood growing up in a Christian household was tough.
Seeing her other siblings have a real relationship with God planted doubt in her mind about her own relationship with Him.
She revealed she was “self-seeking,” “selfish” and “living in a pattern of sin.”
But from the ages of 12 to 16, she experienced the Holy Spirit working in her. Her attitude and how she treated others changed, she said.
However, she hit a valley again in her late teens and early 20s.
The mother of three said, “I felt a bit dry in my relationship with the Lord. I didn’t have a drive to be in God’s Word … I wasn’t praying like I should. I could see this goal of where I wanted to be in my relationship with the Lord, and I wasn’t there.”
She “felt unsettled, restless and frustrated” as she experienced the same “doubts about her salvation” as she did when she was younger.
“I think if Christians were more open about the hard times, I think if Christians were more raw, you might find that more people go through this,” Seewald said.
She encouraged believers to talk about the valleys they experience in their faith instead of feeling like they can’t be honest about their hardships.
She added, “We have to account for the fact that there are trials of faith … there are difficulties that we walk through.”
Seewald described how her struggles with faith impacted her.
“If somebody asked if I was depressed, I probably would have said no,” she said. “But I guess you probably could call it a spiritual depression.”
Seewald shared many resources she used and continues to use in her faith journey and hopes others will check them out.
She ended her testimony video with this truth.
“In this life, though, we experience hardships, and yet we keep running after Christ and Christ holds us fast. I hope this is an encouragement to you, and I pray you will rest in Christ and his work of righteousness on your behalf.”
Watch the full video below.